Quick Relief Tips

Here are some quick and easy techniques you can put to work right now to help you reduce your discomfort from stress and anxiety. Yes! You could begin doing all of them this minute!

In our coaching sessions I will greatly expand on these techniques and introduce you to other proven, more sophisticated, stress relief and relaxation techniques. In a comprehensive program that we design specifically to meet your needs, you can learn to wipe out your stressors and bring more long-lasting emotional stability and pleasure into your life. Sign up today!

Deep Breathing

Deep breathing stimulates oxygen circulation, which in turn stimulates the brain to cut down on the body’s secretion of bloodstream stress related hormones and increase the pleasure hormones and cellular nutrition. When done properly, slow deep breathing causes the abdomen as well as the chest to expand and contract slowly as you inhale and exhale. If your abdomen is not expanding outward, you are not drawing in a deep enough breath. In a quiet place that is free of distractions, sit comfortably, rest your arms and hands comfortably, close your eyes, and focus your mind on an idyllic scene where you would like to see yourself. A inhale and exhale should take about five seconds each. Draw in slowly to maximum lung inflation, and expel slowly and completely. Repeat this ten second couplet about a dozen times one right after the other in a set. Do a deep breathing set soon after you arise in the morning, several times during the day at home or at work (especially when you feel tension, anxiety, or off-center), and before bedtime. Overall, you should quickly feel a sense of improved calmness after each set.


Like breathing, physical exercise has numerous positive physiological effects on our mental and physical health. As part of your time management plan, every day you should allow for at least two planned periods of modest exercise (walking, swimming, bicycling, take the stairs, etc) that encourages blood flow and muscular conditioning. Additionally, it would be ideal for you to also have at least three intense workout sessions per week where you sustain your pulse for half an hour at about 85% of the recommended cardio rate for heavy exertion. Consult with a trainer about your ideal exertion level and workout plan. Consider speed walking, running, forceful swimming or bicycling, high repetition weight training, or other cardio exercises. Regular exercise is the cheapest, most effective and enjoyable form of stress relief that you can do for yourself!

Find Your Mantra

Mantras and affirmations are individualized sounds which have a flowing, meditative quality and may be repeated out loud or inwardly. Both are useful tools for the re-centering of our minds and spirits when we realize that we have mentally stepped off of our Higher Self paths. A mantra usually is a single sound used in conjunction with a visual focus while the person is comfortable and seeking to shut out external stimuli. A calming effect is experienced when you repeat your mantra over and over for several minutes. A affirmation can be a single word or simple phrase that has deep personal meaning, such as “Lighten up”, or “Focus”, or “Live my inner truth”. They can be thought or spoken spontaneously whenever we sense a need for a course correction or gentle reminder. Like mantras. affirmations can work to bring us back into the our Higher Self when we realize we have drifted into destructive attitudes or behavior.


Sex is great! (isn’t it?). It’s physically and mentally pleasurable, in a healthy way it stimulates and then calms, it promotes healthy blood flow, and it can strengthen relationships. Loss of libido is one of the adverse effects of stress. If you’re sex drive has waned, you may be able to revitalize it by practicing some or all of the quick tips I’ve discussed here. And you can practice “mind over matter” by simply telling yourself, “I may not feel physically aroused right now, but if I just make an effort to sexually play with my partner, than I’m sure we’ll both get something good out of it.” You can significantly reduce your stress by enjoying the excitement, arousal, peaked pleasure, and relaxation that make up a sensitive love session.

Communicate Well

Much of the stress we feel has its origins in our communications that are hostile, destructive, inaccurate, or incomplete. If you have not yet recognized and committed to your values, you are much more prone to make communication mistakes that eventually come back to cause you stress. I suggest that you take time with me to specifically identify your values (honesty, clarify, compassion, etc) and make a sincere commitment to practice them always. Once you’ve done this, you can communicate your Inner Truth to others as well as to your Self. A whole new world opens up when you say what you mean and mean what you say. Your strengthened personal integrity shines through to others as they experience your enhanced accountability, dependability, clarity, compassion, and lack of vulnerability.


Meditation allows us to settle down our minds by replacing our mental activity and “cerebral static” with more peaceful awareness, mental focus, calm and relaxation. In essence, meditation allows our awareness to become “rejuvenated”. Most people in the world have already meditated. If you have relaxed while looking at a beautiful sunset, allowing your thoughts to quiet down, this is close to meditation. If you have read a book for a while, then gazed away from it as your mind wanders, or just sat there quietly for a few minutes without applied thinking, this is close to meditation. Your pulse and heart rate slow, and your mind becomes less cluttered. Daydreaming, contemplation, and just plain quiet are simple forms of meditation. Research has shown that people who mediate live longer, happier, and healthier lives. You can practice your own type of simple meditations, or you can learn to mediate through many different organizations and schools.


When you write down your deepest needs and wants, challenges, thoughts, ideas, and feelings, you’ll be surprised how much insight you can gain! With the combined efforts of thinking, emotional responses, recollecting, organizing, and writing, you will easily see new facets of any challenge or stress you are dealing with. Let your new thoughts, feelings and their interpretations stream out of your mind and onto your paper (or less preferably, your computer screen). You can even use this externalizing process as a “stress transfer” mechanism by reminding yourself that the stress is now on the paper — and not in your head anymore! Go with the flow! Stay with it as long as you are enjoying the your self-discovery.

Simplify Your Life

While mediating will ground your mental energy, simplifying, or “de-cluttering” your physical life will help dissolve your feelings of confusion and overwhelm. When you are in the midst of chaos, it’s easy to think that your life is out of control because of the chaos you see and created. You can start to regain your sense of control by simplifying your life. Do a thorough job of grooming and organizing all of your living spaces: home, car, office, shop, briefcase, computer, and so on. Disperse all of your “stuff” in one of three directions: keep handy to use, store for later use, or get rid of it. Be ruthless! In addition to appreciating yourself for a task you’ve done well, seated in your newly groomed environment you’ll smile and feel lighter and a lot more in control of your life.


Music does a wonderful job on the right side of our brains, which in turn treat our bodies very well with pleasure inducing hormones. As you already know, your brain on music creates an inner environment of well-being, pleasure. creativity, and emotional highs (and lows). Listening to your favorite music (come on now, you can turn it up!), or new music that intrigues you, occupies your consciousness so that thoughts of pain, fear, and stress can drift off into oblivion. Music, like other creative, experiences, is therapy, so your expanded music self-therapy can only help you toward the inner calm you want.

Build a Stress Resistant Body

When you have a “Stress Steady” body, you have a healthy support system that helps to keep your mind fit and functional. You can increase your body’s stress resilience first and foremost by proper nutrition (yes, I know you’ve heard this before). This means 1) eating with an emphasis on protein and fresh produce with a de-emphasis on processed foods, sugars, and carbohydrates; 2) limiting your consumption of unnecessary medications, recreational drugs, alcohol, and caffeine; and 3) getting plenty of moderate and intense exercise every week. A healthier body leads to a healthier. stress relieved, mind.

Complimentary Coaching Session

Most life coaches (including me) offer a complimentary introductory get-to-know-you coaching session as a prelude to you signing up for a coaching program. These are no-obligation opportunities for both prospective clients and coaches to check on the comfort of fit in the potential partnership. After our opening discussions, I ask my prospects to select one defined topic that they want to work on, then we immediately zero in on it during the “laser” coaching session. When my prospect enjoys some “Ah-ha!” moments, the stage is set for us to begin our coaching partnership that leads to the client’s accelerated growth and empowerment.


You want to feel better right on the spot? Then express some gratitude to someone who has created something positive in your life. Ideally you will speak person-to-person as you openly acknowledge their contribution to your life. You can initiate such a conversation by opening with, “Sue, I want to thank you for…”, or “Gary, you did something for me that really mattered…”, or “Brenda, I want you to know what a wonderful difference you’ve made in my life…”. You may also write the gratitude and send it on paper or computer. Regardless of the medium used, you will find that you will feel better right in the moment. The positive aspects of expressing gratitude benefit both the recipient as well as the originator.


Oh, that feels so-o-o-o good! All of us appreciate the healing touch of a soothing massage. We come out of it relaxed, calmed, and centered. The loosening (de-tensioning) of our joints and muscles helps us to re-align our bodies and minds so that we can experience a greater integrated relaxation. Treat yourself to massage soon after reading this passage! You can expect to pay about $1 per minute for a professional massage, or you can barter for it to conserve your cash flow.

Habit Restructuring

Bad habits. Yep, we’ve all got them, like lying, being late, obsessing over orderliness, unhealthy eating, and so on. Most of us would just as soon shift the balance more in favor of our good habits. You can shift this balance if you: 1) practice a pause before you act so that you can consciously re-direct your thoughts and behavior in a constructive direction; 2) remove bad habit triggers form your home and office; 3) replace your habit with some form of positive treat; and 4) turn your habit into a constructive specialty. I can coach you to more fully explore these and other habit restructuring skills.


My wife is completely committed to her yoga routine. It strengthens her muscles while it improves her physical and mental balance, flexibility and agility. I noticed how her disposition improved significantly within a year after she started yoga. You, too, can create greater mental and physical health by practicing yoga on your own or in a class. The social aspect of yoga can be particularly effective at stress reduction.